1
00:00:09,930 --> 00:00:14,589
I've booked the stag, my friends. A
Grease the Musical themed weekend in

2
00:00:14,590 --> 00:00:18,249
-super -Mare. I'm really grateful to you
and Jack Adish for giving Luke a job.

3
00:00:18,250 --> 00:00:19,690
Do you want to dance like him?

4
00:00:20,370 --> 00:00:22,530
Nancy Crook, our melon friend.

5
00:00:22,531 --> 00:00:26,409
Although we are hoping it might become
something more substantial, aren't we,

6
00:00:26,410 --> 00:00:30,209
Bab? Are we? If you're really sorry for
what you did, if you really want to sort

7
00:00:30,210 --> 00:00:32,049
it out, then tell him face to face.

8
00:00:32,390 --> 00:00:33,440
Hello, Stella.

9
00:00:34,770 --> 00:00:36,210
Luke, is this your dad?

10
00:00:36,490 --> 00:00:37,540
Rob?

11
00:00:37,541 --> 00:00:41,269
Then you know that, don't you? Because
you've been having secret little

12
00:00:41,270 --> 00:00:42,320
behind my back.

13
00:01:09,290 --> 00:01:11,700
blue tabard anyway, have you? What's a
tabard?

14
00:01:11,750 --> 00:01:13,590
Like a tank top for dinner ladies.

15
00:01:14,750 --> 00:01:15,800
Nah.

16
00:01:16,970 --> 00:01:18,020
I'll get it.

17
00:01:19,071 --> 00:01:22,869
You can give me a hand, could you, love?

18
00:01:22,870 --> 00:01:23,869
You know, it's like finished.

19
00:01:23,870 --> 00:01:25,670
I get up and if I stop halfway through.

20
00:01:26,030 --> 00:01:27,080
Here's Nadine.

21
00:01:27,450 --> 00:01:31,010
Nadine? Morning, Nadine. How are we all
today?

22
00:01:31,390 --> 00:01:34,100
I just wanted to pop in and get the
money for Emma's hen.

23
00:01:34,230 --> 00:01:35,280
Dad's paying for me.

24
00:01:35,281 --> 00:01:36,319
Is he?

25
00:01:36,320 --> 00:01:39,870
Yeah, can I give it to you on the
weekend, Nadine? I'm running late, I am.

26
00:01:43,820 --> 00:01:46,230
It's a stunning place we're going, Em.
Stunning.

27
00:01:46,480 --> 00:01:49,520
Four stars a day, whilst five with a
taste for the helipads.

28
00:01:49,780 --> 00:01:50,830
That was amazing.

29
00:01:51,200 --> 00:01:52,250
Done then.

30
00:01:55,420 --> 00:01:58,180
So Friday night was quite eventful.

31
00:01:58,980 --> 00:02:00,030
There you go.

32
00:02:00,031 --> 00:02:03,979
And I heard your Luke's been camping out
at the Belmont ever since. What does

33
00:02:03,980 --> 00:02:04,779
Dad like?

34
00:02:04,780 --> 00:02:05,830
Right.

35
00:02:05,831 --> 00:02:06,949
I've got to get on.

36
00:02:06,950 --> 00:02:08,270
God, I fell for you, myself.

37
00:02:08,729 --> 00:02:10,649
Seeing Rob Morgan after all them years.

38
00:02:10,650 --> 00:02:12,709
Because he's a good -looking fella,
isn't he?

39
00:02:12,710 --> 00:02:13,609
Aged well.

40
00:02:13,610 --> 00:02:17,249
But then I suppose men age so much
better than women, don't they? Do they?

41
00:02:17,250 --> 00:02:18,810
You and Carl look about the same.

42
00:02:20,190 --> 00:02:22,600
They do help to lash out sometimes,
don't they?

43
00:02:23,350 --> 00:02:24,400
Hello!

44
00:02:27,590 --> 00:02:28,710
You look like shite.

45
00:02:29,370 --> 00:02:31,230
It's because you snore like a bastard.

46
00:02:31,490 --> 00:02:32,540
Oh, very nice.

47
00:02:32,541 --> 00:02:36,279
Buy someone dinner, take them to a five
-star hotel, lend them a shirt, and all

48
00:02:36,280 --> 00:02:37,330
they do is complain.

49
00:02:39,100 --> 00:02:42,530
I could ask again about another room.
Someone might have checked out.

50
00:02:43,540 --> 00:02:46,130
Or you could go and see if your mother's
calmed down.

51
00:02:47,961 --> 00:02:51,179
And what is it you're meant to be?

52
00:02:51,180 --> 00:02:52,230
T -bird, is it?

53
00:02:52,640 --> 00:02:54,280
Yeah. What do you reckon?

54
00:02:56,240 --> 00:02:58,800
Well, it's, you know, accurate.

55
00:03:01,620 --> 00:03:02,670
Thanks, Del.

56
00:03:02,671 --> 00:03:05,069
Of course, the bloody arm and the leg,
these did.

57
00:03:05,070 --> 00:03:06,650
Still, worth it, is it?

58
00:03:07,350 --> 00:03:08,400
Definitely.

59
00:03:08,401 --> 00:03:10,689
Where do you do on these, then?

60
00:03:10,690 --> 00:03:12,980
Oh, dump them anywhere. I'll sort it out
later.

61
00:03:13,330 --> 00:03:14,790
Howdy! Howdy, mate!

62
00:03:16,610 --> 00:03:18,490
Oh, what's all this then?

63
00:03:19,470 --> 00:03:22,310
It's, er, fourth annual DAG this
weekend.

64
00:03:22,311 --> 00:03:25,309
We're going to let those characters from
Greece play.

65
00:03:25,310 --> 00:03:26,450
Jack's favourite film.

66
00:03:26,670 --> 00:03:29,570
Oh, it's a proper little John Travolta,
isn't it?

67
00:03:29,870 --> 00:03:31,770
Oh, morning, Stella.

68
00:03:33,220 --> 00:03:37,839
Oh, actually, I'm glad you're here
because I've been meaning to ask, when

69
00:03:37,840 --> 00:03:38,890
hen?

70
00:03:39,360 --> 00:03:40,500
Same time as the stag.

71
00:03:40,820 --> 00:03:41,870
What, this weekend?

72
00:03:42,180 --> 00:03:43,500
Oh, why didn't you say?

73
00:03:44,160 --> 00:03:46,480
Well, it's Nadine that's been organising
it.

74
00:03:46,720 --> 00:03:48,480
Oh, I'll make one of his own cakes.

75
00:03:48,920 --> 00:03:49,970
A hen cake?

76
00:03:50,100 --> 00:03:51,800
A cake sounds like a hen.

77
00:03:51,801 --> 00:03:54,739
Nancy, I don't know if they're going to
invite you. I wonder if anyone's got a

78
00:03:54,740 --> 00:03:55,790
nut allergy.

79
00:04:57,119 --> 00:04:58,480
It was a joke, right?

80
00:04:59,740 --> 00:05:00,790
At your birthday?

81
00:05:02,090 --> 00:05:03,140
My outfit?

82
00:05:03,950 --> 00:05:05,530
It were meant to be ironic, like.

83
00:05:06,070 --> 00:05:07,120
Oh.

84
00:05:07,490 --> 00:05:09,540
OK. I know you were wondering why I wore
it.

85
00:05:10,690 --> 00:05:13,700
No, not really. I just wanted to tell
you it was a joke, right?

86
00:05:13,990 --> 00:05:15,610
They didn't make a big thing of it.

87
00:05:16,270 --> 00:05:17,770
And I meant to fall over and all.

88
00:05:20,110 --> 00:05:21,160
Right.

89
00:05:21,330 --> 00:05:22,380
For a laugh.

90
00:05:31,361 --> 00:05:34,539
You sure you don't want me to help?

91
00:05:34,540 --> 00:05:35,720
I said I'm fine.

92
00:05:36,600 --> 00:05:37,860
What's with the laundry?

93
00:05:37,880 --> 00:05:39,580
It's not laundry, it's ironing.

94
00:05:39,581 --> 00:05:43,659
What's with the ironing? Executive
ironing for executives, and that is an

95
00:05:43,660 --> 00:05:44,710
executive tabard.

96
00:05:46,840 --> 00:05:48,400
Look, it's what I do, all right?

97
00:05:48,620 --> 00:05:49,800
I run my own business.

98
00:05:50,880 --> 00:05:52,440
All right with you, Lord Sugar?

99
00:05:56,960 --> 00:05:58,010
Never used to smoke.

100
00:05:58,200 --> 00:05:59,820
You never used to ride a tricycle.

101
00:06:03,630 --> 00:06:04,950
So what happens now, then?

102
00:06:05,590 --> 00:06:08,060
Aren't we meant to exchange insurance
details?

103
00:06:09,950 --> 00:06:12,300
I don't know. I haven't got a bloody
clue enough.

104
00:06:14,070 --> 00:06:15,930
And you've got things to get back for?

105
00:06:16,250 --> 00:06:17,300
Work?

106
00:06:18,890 --> 00:06:19,940
Or people?

107
00:06:20,930 --> 00:06:23,490
I run my own business as well, so it's
not a problem.

108
00:06:23,750 --> 00:06:28,650
Maybe I could do things for Luke while
I'm over here. You know, help him out,

109
00:06:28,690 --> 00:06:30,070
like. I'm not making you tell.

110
00:06:30,071 --> 00:06:33,229
Well, I didn't say he needed help. He
doesn't need help. It's not an insult.

111
00:06:33,230 --> 00:06:36,409
just saying, that's all. Oh, now exactly
would you help him? Give him money, is

112
00:06:36,410 --> 00:06:39,829
it? Sorry I wasn't you when you were
teething. It's not about money. I missed

113
00:06:39,830 --> 00:06:43,229
your school play years ago. Oh, you've
still got your temper then. And the

114
00:06:43,230 --> 00:06:44,910
ability to talk over anyone.

115
00:06:44,911 --> 00:06:48,409
Why don't I write down how much money I
spent over the years looking after him,

116
00:06:48,410 --> 00:06:50,150
Rob, and send you a bloody invoice?

117
00:06:52,350 --> 00:06:55,060
At least you saved a few quid when he
was in prison, eh?

118
00:07:11,720 --> 00:07:14,900
You know, I was just thinking about a
friend of mine,

119
00:07:15,760 --> 00:07:16,810
Terry.

120
00:07:17,280 --> 00:07:20,040
He used to work in a factory in Swansea.

121
00:07:20,960 --> 00:07:27,739
Anyway, on his way home, on the day he
had been laid off, in fact, Terry

122
00:07:27,740 --> 00:07:29,420
crashed into an ice cream van.

123
00:07:29,421 --> 00:07:33,899
And he got talking to the ice cream
seller, and it turned out the guy had a

124
00:07:33,900 --> 00:07:35,100
whole fleet of vans.

125
00:07:35,620 --> 00:07:39,660
And now my friend Terry drives one of
those vans.

126
00:07:40,910 --> 00:07:44,789
So in the end, it all worked out for the
best, even though he had just been laid

127
00:07:44,790 --> 00:07:45,840
off.

128
00:07:46,910 --> 00:07:49,200
Are you laying me off, Jack? I'm really
sorry.

129
00:07:53,990 --> 00:07:55,040
Don't worry about it.

130
00:07:55,810 --> 00:07:57,190
You've been good to me, like.

131
00:07:58,650 --> 00:08:01,480
Well, sometimes these things, they
happen for a reason.

132
00:08:02,090 --> 00:08:05,849
You never know, the next person through
that door could change your life

133
00:08:05,850 --> 00:08:06,900
forever.

134
00:08:10,440 --> 00:08:12,320
Do the nakedness in a tip -top, please.

135
00:08:13,460 --> 00:08:14,510
By the cat food.

136
00:08:15,080 --> 00:08:16,130
Thanking you.

137
00:08:18,340 --> 00:08:19,390
All right?

138
00:08:27,740 --> 00:08:30,150
You've been working in that van since I
was a kid.

139
00:08:31,460 --> 00:08:32,600
Probably the same fish.

140
00:08:35,679 --> 00:08:37,729
What was it like round here in them
days?

141
00:08:40,909 --> 00:08:41,959
Exactly the same.

142
00:08:41,960 --> 00:08:44,369
Something must have changed.

143
00:08:44,370 --> 00:08:46,960
Well, they've got plastic bins now. Used
to be metal.

144
00:08:48,230 --> 00:08:52,130
Me and Gary Evans used to set fire to
the lids and cook hot dogs on them.

145
00:08:52,550 --> 00:08:54,470
You don't love the cock and cheese, Rob.

146
00:08:55,090 --> 00:08:58,010
Ate the cock and burger, but I love the
cock and cheese.

147
00:08:59,930 --> 00:09:01,070
Nice new back boot.

148
00:09:02,430 --> 00:09:03,480
Come on in.

149
00:09:03,650 --> 00:09:06,180
Come on in. Talking about things that
never change.

150
00:09:09,640 --> 00:09:12,650
She was the first girl in our year to
get caught shoplifting.

151
00:09:13,240 --> 00:09:15,950
She nicked a bottle of nail varnish and
a support sock.

152
00:09:16,880 --> 00:09:19,410
The school expelled her, but she wasn't
bothered.

153
00:09:19,860 --> 00:09:22,270
She was going out with Trevor Mackey at
the time.

154
00:09:22,920 --> 00:09:26,780
He drove a Kawasaki 125 and he could
spit onto the roof of the bus shelter.

155
00:09:27,920 --> 00:09:29,600
What more could a girl ask for, eh?

156
00:09:30,160 --> 00:09:31,420
Right, come on in, you lot.

157
00:09:32,140 --> 00:09:33,190
Come on.

158
00:09:34,500 --> 00:09:35,700
Better get this lot home.

159
00:09:36,520 --> 00:09:37,570
We need a nap.

160
00:09:39,080 --> 00:09:40,600
All that saturated fat.

161
00:09:45,460 --> 00:09:47,020
It's like the mafia, this place.

162
00:09:48,260 --> 00:09:49,310
You're in it for life.

163
00:09:51,820 --> 00:09:53,930
Some people like you like that, I
suppose.

164
00:09:57,441 --> 00:09:59,859
Want to eat beer tonight?

165
00:09:59,860 --> 00:10:00,899
All right.

166
00:10:00,900 --> 00:10:01,950
You're all buying.

167
00:10:04,520 --> 00:10:06,140
God, this really is the same fish.

168
00:10:30,769 --> 00:10:31,819
Total lifesaver.

169
00:10:33,071 --> 00:10:35,209
How's your day going?

170
00:10:35,210 --> 00:10:36,260
Oh, don't ask.

171
00:10:37,370 --> 00:10:39,330
Some dozy dickhead cut me up.

172
00:10:39,930 --> 00:10:41,010
I'm all right, though.

173
00:10:41,030 --> 00:10:42,080
You sure?

174
00:10:42,230 --> 00:10:43,280
Yeah.

175
00:10:46,230 --> 00:10:47,430
How's everything else?

176
00:10:47,950 --> 00:10:49,000
Yeah, fine.

177
00:10:50,650 --> 00:10:53,630
Listen, babe, I'm sorry I've not been
myself lately.

178
00:10:53,631 --> 00:10:56,549
Things will get back on track, don't I
promise?

179
00:10:56,550 --> 00:11:00,229
Right. Well, after Emma's wedding, I'm
going to take you away somewhere dead

180
00:11:00,230 --> 00:11:02,010
romantic. Aw.

181
00:11:02,430 --> 00:11:06,670
And shag you senseless. Oh, easy now.

182
00:11:06,671 --> 00:11:08,349
We're not far from a school.

183
00:11:08,350 --> 00:11:09,549
Are you serious, though?

184
00:11:09,550 --> 00:11:10,710
Are you up for it?

185
00:11:11,290 --> 00:11:12,650
I'm over the pre -press.

186
00:11:12,930 --> 00:11:14,230
I'm a Ponteberry girl.

187
00:11:17,310 --> 00:11:20,610
You don't look much like Kinnicky.

188
00:11:21,530 --> 00:11:24,420
How many times, woman, I'm not going as
Kinnicky anymore.

189
00:11:24,730 --> 00:11:25,830
I'm going as Leo.

190
00:11:26,390 --> 00:11:30,609
leader of the Scorpion gang who raised
Danny at Thunder Road. Sonny, put your

191
00:11:30,610 --> 00:11:31,990
outfit on. We'll have a photo.

192
00:11:32,610 --> 00:11:34,350
Give me a minute to do my make -up. Dad.

193
00:11:34,650 --> 00:11:36,410
Well, Leo had pockmarked skin.

194
00:11:36,790 --> 00:11:38,780
Dad, I don't want to do the grease
thing.

195
00:11:38,830 --> 00:11:40,730
What? I want to do something else.

196
00:11:40,731 --> 00:11:42,509
Devin Wilson's brother went to
Amsterdam.

197
00:11:42,510 --> 00:11:44,009
You're not going to Amsterdam.

198
00:11:44,010 --> 00:11:46,120
He caught scabies off a prostitute's
dog.

199
00:11:46,121 --> 00:11:50,489
It's a little bit late in the day to
change your mind. I never wanted to do

200
00:11:50,490 --> 00:11:51,540
in the first place.

201
00:11:51,570 --> 00:11:52,620
I would be nice.

202
00:11:53,130 --> 00:11:54,770
I don't even like a bloody film.

203
00:11:55,210 --> 00:11:57,190
That bloody isn't swearing.

204
00:11:57,790 --> 00:12:00,490
Look, I just want a normal stag do.

205
00:12:00,491 --> 00:12:04,369
Well, maybe we can go to Amsterdam
dressed as the T -bar. Nobody's going to

206
00:12:04,370 --> 00:12:05,420
Amsterdam.

207
00:12:05,470 --> 00:12:06,520
Sorry, I'm dying.

208
00:12:06,790 --> 00:12:08,290
A packet of Triple A's, please.

209
00:12:08,710 --> 00:12:12,510
You want a good stag do, Sonny? I'll
give you a good stag do.

210
00:12:12,511 --> 00:12:13,229
Oh, yeah?

211
00:12:13,230 --> 00:12:14,089
Oh, yeah.

212
00:12:14,090 --> 00:12:15,530
You leave it to your Uncle Guy.

213
00:12:15,950 --> 00:12:18,600
Oh, I'll give you a stag do that you
will never forget.

214
00:12:19,850 --> 00:12:23,640
I'll take you places that'll make your
grandchildren's hair turn grey. Oh,

215
00:12:23,650 --> 00:12:25,030
that's very kind of you, Dad.

216
00:12:25,330 --> 00:12:26,380
Shit.

217
00:12:32,510 --> 00:12:33,560
Emma?

218
00:12:38,330 --> 00:12:39,380
Right.

219
00:12:42,390 --> 00:12:43,770
Where'd you get that shirt?

220
00:12:45,970 --> 00:12:47,020
It's Rob's.

221
00:12:49,521 --> 00:12:53,749
I've just come to pick up a couple of
things.

222
00:12:53,750 --> 00:12:54,800
Okay.

223
00:12:56,670 --> 00:12:58,600
I could stop for a cup of tea if you
want.

224
00:12:59,810 --> 00:13:01,130
Tea? Only if you want me to.

225
00:13:03,310 --> 00:13:04,360
Ma 'am.

226
00:13:05,450 --> 00:13:06,690
Give me a cutch.

227
00:13:13,650 --> 00:13:20,470
Very posh.

228
00:13:20,900 --> 00:13:21,950
French, apparently.

229
00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:24,050
For the catalogue.

230
00:13:26,740 --> 00:13:27,790
How was work?

231
00:13:29,140 --> 00:13:30,760
Er, not great.

232
00:13:31,960 --> 00:13:33,010
I got laid off.

233
00:13:33,880 --> 00:13:34,930
You're joking.

234
00:13:34,931 --> 00:13:37,159
There was no job for me there, to be
honest.

235
00:13:37,160 --> 00:13:38,660
Jack was just doing me a favour.

236
00:13:38,661 --> 00:13:41,619
Right, well, we just have to find him
something else, then.

237
00:13:41,620 --> 00:13:45,110
We'll try the garage. They're always
looking for people at the garage.

238
00:13:45,120 --> 00:13:46,200
I tell you what...

239
00:13:46,650 --> 00:13:49,450
How about I make you a nice shepherd's
pie?

240
00:13:49,730 --> 00:13:52,790
I've already... That'd be lovely,
thanks.

241
00:13:54,070 --> 00:13:55,150
You've already eaten.

242
00:13:55,790 --> 00:13:57,170
Rob bought me fish and chips.

243
00:13:58,410 --> 00:13:59,460
Did he?

244
00:13:59,630 --> 00:14:01,680
I just want to get to know him a bit, ma
'am.

245
00:14:01,750 --> 00:14:02,800
That's all.

246
00:14:03,210 --> 00:14:04,890
Who knows, he might be a right dick.

247
00:14:28,329 --> 00:14:29,379
Wakey, wakey.

248
00:14:34,710 --> 00:14:35,990
Special day today.

249
00:14:42,010 --> 00:14:45,080
You just don't look like you'd like to
go camping, that's all.

250
00:14:45,081 --> 00:14:45,929
I know.

251
00:14:45,930 --> 00:14:47,930
I mean, where exactly has he taken you?

252
00:14:48,290 --> 00:14:51,240
I reckon Beacon. Well, at least you'll
be safe with Uncle Di.

253
00:14:51,410 --> 00:14:52,460
You were in the army.

254
00:14:52,950 --> 00:14:54,570
The army killed people.

255
00:14:56,250 --> 00:14:57,300
Oh, come on.

256
00:14:57,301 --> 00:15:02,459
Better than going to some manky lap
-dancing club, though, innit?

257
00:15:02,460 --> 00:15:03,239
I suppose.

258
00:15:03,240 --> 00:15:04,259
Or Amsterdam.

259
00:15:04,260 --> 00:15:06,000
Imagine who was going to Amsterdam.

260
00:15:06,040 --> 00:15:07,090
I know.

261
00:15:07,540 --> 00:15:08,590
That'd be awful.

262
00:15:13,680 --> 00:15:15,420
Are you two spending a night apart?

263
00:15:16,080 --> 00:15:17,130
Me too, babe.

264
00:15:17,700 --> 00:15:19,620
I get so lonely in bed on my own.

265
00:15:20,840 --> 00:15:24,360
Maybe we could have one of our special
phone calls later.

266
00:15:25,420 --> 00:15:28,020
I will ring you 2200 hours.

267
00:15:28,570 --> 00:15:31,250
Make sure your knife is out of its
sheath.

268
00:15:34,790 --> 00:15:35,840
Hello, boys.

269
00:15:35,910 --> 00:15:36,960
All right?

270
00:15:37,630 --> 00:15:41,949
Because it is a dark night, it doesn't
mean you can drink. Ma 'am. Because if

271
00:15:41,950 --> 00:15:44,570
you do, I will find out. Ma 'am. I will.

272
00:15:46,430 --> 00:15:49,730
Come on, you lot.

273
00:15:50,030 --> 00:15:51,990
Stop your grinning and grab your linen.

274
00:15:52,750 --> 00:15:54,430
Oh, my God, I see this.

275
00:15:56,540 --> 00:15:57,590
Lee,

276
00:15:57,591 --> 00:15:58,639
what were you doing?

277
00:15:58,640 --> 00:16:01,110
I thought we was going as people from
Grease Lake.

278
00:16:07,620 --> 00:16:08,670
Lee? Yeah, hey?

279
00:16:09,760 --> 00:16:10,810
Oh, yeah.

280
00:16:10,940 --> 00:16:11,990
What?

281
00:16:14,880 --> 00:16:15,960
What's he doing here?

282
00:16:16,040 --> 00:16:17,420
Son -in -law said he was okay.

283
00:16:17,421 --> 00:16:20,339
And you're all right without him here?

284
00:16:20,340 --> 00:16:21,390
Why wouldn't I be?

285
00:16:52,220 --> 00:16:55,350
Oh, that's class, that is. Yeah, it's a
bit of our age, isn't it?

286
00:16:55,480 --> 00:16:56,530
I have to say.

287
00:16:56,531 --> 00:16:59,079
I was expecting something a little bit
more.

288
00:16:59,080 --> 00:17:00,130
Economy club?

289
00:17:00,320 --> 00:17:01,640
Four stars it is, Tan.

290
00:17:01,920 --> 00:17:04,520
It was five when they took over the
helipad.

291
00:17:04,720 --> 00:17:06,460
Race you to the pool, ladies!

292
00:17:06,461 --> 00:17:12,078
There's not going to be a room for her.
They're full booked this weekend.

293
00:17:12,079 --> 00:17:13,879
She's just going to have to share then,
isn't she?

294
00:17:13,880 --> 00:17:14,879
Why can't you share with her?

295
00:17:14,880 --> 00:17:16,930
You've got more in common, like your
age.

296
00:17:20,300 --> 00:17:26,429
Oh, if you need any help rubbing that
in, I've got magic hands.

297
00:17:26,430 --> 00:17:27,609
Just ask Alan's feet.

298
00:17:41,590 --> 00:17:42,850
Far enough, isn't it?

299
00:17:43,270 --> 00:17:44,320
All right.

300
00:17:45,830 --> 00:17:48,870
Hey, boys, listen up. There's something
I want to say.

301
00:17:49,170 --> 00:17:50,450
You forgot the stripper!

302
00:17:51,900 --> 00:17:54,070
Right, we're all here for a laugh and a
joke.

303
00:17:54,420 --> 00:17:56,040
But let's not forget where we are.

304
00:17:57,420 --> 00:17:58,620
These hills are killers.

305
00:17:59,380 --> 00:18:00,640
You could die of exposure.

306
00:18:01,560 --> 00:18:02,820
You could drown in a river.

307
00:18:03,480 --> 00:18:05,770
You could fall down a hill and break
your neck.

308
00:18:06,980 --> 00:18:12,119
There are marshy bogs, impossible to
see, which could swallow you up so you

309
00:18:12,120 --> 00:18:14,900
in slow, suffocating agony.

310
00:18:17,540 --> 00:18:18,720
I saw that happen once.

311
00:18:20,010 --> 00:18:22,710
Poor lad, he had a wife and two young
'uns.

312
00:18:24,170 --> 00:18:27,450
She tried to say something at the
funeral, but she broke down.

313
00:18:29,950 --> 00:18:32,720
She just hugged those little kiddies so
tight, Sophie.

314
00:18:34,510 --> 00:18:35,560
Very tight.

315
00:18:37,970 --> 00:18:41,130
Anyway, just something to think about.

316
00:18:43,150 --> 00:18:45,230
Right, let's get this party started.

317
00:18:56,680 --> 00:18:59,330
The ground's too soft over there. The
pegs won't grip.

318
00:18:59,900 --> 00:19:00,950
Seems all right to me.

319
00:19:04,000 --> 00:19:07,800
You know in Canada, right, you get bears
coming into the garden and that.

320
00:19:08,560 --> 00:19:11,450
Well, they've been known to go through
people's rubbish.

321
00:19:11,620 --> 00:19:12,670
Serious?

322
00:19:12,671 --> 00:19:16,919
This bloke told me once that if a black
bear comes at you, you've got to stand

323
00:19:16,920 --> 00:19:21,000
your ground and look him straight in the
eye and scream as loud as you can.

324
00:19:21,860 --> 00:19:23,240
Scares him off, apparently.

325
00:19:24,730 --> 00:19:26,410
Mind you, he's dead now, the bloke.

326
00:19:27,470 --> 00:19:29,030
Did he get eaten by a bear, like?

327
00:19:30,030 --> 00:19:31,650
No, he was knocked down by a lorry.

328
00:19:32,730 --> 00:19:33,780
Driven by a bear.

329
00:19:36,810 --> 00:19:38,310
You should come over sometime.

330
00:19:39,350 --> 00:19:40,910
See what it's like for yourself.

331
00:19:41,050 --> 00:19:42,350
You'd be lucky I'm skid.

332
00:19:43,110 --> 00:19:44,160
I'll buy you a ticket.

333
00:19:44,770 --> 00:19:45,820
You can stop with me.

334
00:20:14,600 --> 00:20:15,650
Rob's on the stag.

335
00:20:15,651 --> 00:20:20,079
Can you believe Rob have gone on the
stag? There's no need to dwell on it,

336
00:20:20,080 --> 00:20:21,580
Let's just have a nice weekend.

337
00:20:21,780 --> 00:20:23,240
Oh, bastard!

338
00:20:23,920 --> 00:20:26,340
I'm not dwelling on it. I'm just... Yes!

339
00:20:26,760 --> 00:20:30,560
I'm just saying, that's all.

340
00:20:31,280 --> 00:20:32,330
Ah!

341
00:20:32,331 --> 00:20:37,419
Now, I've basically tidied up your basic
for Jojo and I've left you with a

342
00:20:37,420 --> 00:20:38,500
little landing strip.

343
00:20:38,501 --> 00:20:40,959
Are you sure you don't want me to get
rid of the old lot?

344
00:20:40,960 --> 00:20:43,070
What, and I've nothing down there at
all?

345
00:20:43,071 --> 00:20:46,579
It's a bit weird, isn't it? It's all the
rage these days, my love.

346
00:20:46,580 --> 00:20:47,860
No one likes a hairy Mary.

347
00:20:49,240 --> 00:20:51,160
Well, you could do something like that.

348
00:20:53,380 --> 00:20:54,700
Are you going on that ship?

349
00:20:54,701 --> 00:20:55,679
Yes, I am.

350
00:20:55,680 --> 00:20:58,870
It's got a book on topiary. It spends
hours down there sometimes.

351
00:20:58,980 --> 00:21:00,960
Paula, is this going to be about Rob?

352
00:21:01,280 --> 00:21:02,380
No. Yes.

353
00:21:03,140 --> 00:21:04,190
It's our turn.

354
00:21:04,560 --> 00:21:07,690
Can we just have a laugh and leave all
that other stuff behind?

355
00:21:08,020 --> 00:21:09,440
Yeah. You're right.

356
00:21:14,960 --> 00:21:16,010
Is that a panda?

357
00:21:16,400 --> 00:21:18,340
No, it's a swan.

358
00:21:20,360 --> 00:21:23,860
The key to surviving out here is
patience.

359
00:21:24,100 --> 00:21:30,840
We wait, like a hawk, until we pounce.

360
00:21:34,260 --> 00:21:36,880
As I said, patience.

361
00:21:37,600 --> 00:21:39,000
Right, where you go, lads?

362
00:21:39,480 --> 00:21:41,160
Die? Die.

363
00:21:41,161 --> 00:21:44,779
I've got my whalies in the minibus. Go
barefoot, then. I've got these terrible

364
00:21:44,780 --> 00:21:45,739
children in the sea.

365
00:21:45,740 --> 00:21:47,200
Sonnel. Sonnel.

366
00:21:47,201 --> 00:21:48,719
Soft wrist.

367
00:21:48,720 --> 00:21:49,770
Remember?

368
00:21:50,040 --> 00:21:51,200
Flick from the elbow.

369
00:21:53,200 --> 00:21:55,120
Jag! Where do you get that from?

370
00:21:55,700 --> 00:21:56,750
Argo.

371
00:21:56,960 --> 00:21:58,010
Die!

372
00:21:58,380 --> 00:21:59,880
How do I get back to camp again?

373
00:22:00,440 --> 00:22:01,490
Follow the path.

374
00:22:01,960 --> 00:22:03,520
Knee. Knee. Knee.

375
00:22:03,760 --> 00:22:04,810
Flick. Dab.

376
00:22:04,840 --> 00:22:06,680
Flick. Dab. Dab. Yeah?

377
00:22:07,360 --> 00:22:08,740
That's it, George. Perfect!

378
00:22:56,780 --> 00:22:58,220
I would do this every week.

379
00:22:58,740 --> 00:23:00,080
Look, Tony, Rob's loaded.

380
00:23:00,480 --> 00:23:02,160
He runs his own company in Everton.

381
00:23:02,161 --> 00:23:05,339
Yeah, well, there's more to life than
money, Press.

382
00:23:05,340 --> 00:23:07,320
How much do you reckon he makes, though?

383
00:23:07,321 --> 00:23:08,379
I don't know.

384
00:23:08,380 --> 00:23:10,120
I've never really thought about it.

385
00:23:10,200 --> 00:23:13,330
Look, Tess, he's got a massive house. He
showed him support all.

386
00:23:13,700 --> 00:23:15,870
Yeah, well, this is your day, you know,
Rob.

387
00:23:15,871 --> 00:23:19,479
So let's have a nice weekend and put all
the rest of that stuff behind us, shall

388
00:23:19,480 --> 00:23:20,530
we?

389
00:23:30,120 --> 00:23:31,170
Must they have?

390
00:23:40,280 --> 00:23:42,930
Dad says, can you hurry up? He wants to
light the fire.

391
00:23:43,460 --> 00:23:44,510
That's funny.

392
00:23:44,720 --> 00:23:46,520
I don't remember him being so strict.

393
00:23:49,940 --> 00:23:52,410
I take it you don't want to kill me
anymore, then?

394
00:23:52,620 --> 00:23:54,180
I didn't say I wanted to kill you.

395
00:23:54,820 --> 00:23:56,080
I just said I might have to.

396
00:23:58,000 --> 00:23:59,320
When are you heading back?

397
00:23:59,521 --> 00:24:01,779
Not enough wood, I guess.

398
00:24:01,780 --> 00:24:02,830
To Canada.

399
00:24:03,380 --> 00:24:05,360
Ah, everyone's favourite question.

400
00:24:06,560 --> 00:24:08,060
Well, I'm not altogether sure.

401
00:24:08,061 --> 00:24:10,919
Won't your family or whatever be missing
you?

402
00:24:10,920 --> 00:24:11,970
Not married.

403
00:24:12,500 --> 00:24:13,550
Anymore.

404
00:24:15,320 --> 00:24:17,120
You've been seeing each other long?

405
00:24:19,100 --> 00:24:20,150
You and Stella?

406
00:24:21,000 --> 00:24:22,050
Three months.

407
00:24:22,980 --> 00:24:24,220
She seems very happy.

408
00:24:25,120 --> 00:24:26,170
Yeah.

409
00:24:27,800 --> 00:24:29,740
She was always very feisty at school.

410
00:24:30,629 --> 00:24:31,679
She's still feisty?

411
00:24:32,490 --> 00:24:33,810
She's a lot of things, Rob.

412
00:24:35,441 --> 00:24:39,769
Probably got enough there, don't you
think?

413
00:24:39,770 --> 00:24:40,820
Yeah.

414
00:24:41,550 --> 00:24:43,170
Get that fire started, shall we?

415
00:24:47,270 --> 00:24:50,050
Alan could do with a fishing on one of
these.

416
00:24:50,630 --> 00:24:53,230
Oh, he gets very stressed after his
lollipopping.

417
00:24:55,990 --> 00:24:57,040
Cake?

418
00:24:57,290 --> 00:24:58,430
No, I'm fine, thanks.

419
00:25:00,570 --> 00:25:06,270
Oh, you know, I count my lucky stars
every day that I'm with Alan.

420
00:25:06,990 --> 00:25:11,010
I do wonder, though, why wasn't he
snapped up before?

421
00:25:11,750 --> 00:25:15,120
I did ask him why he was single for so
long, and you know what he said?

422
00:25:15,610 --> 00:25:19,870
No, he said he was saving himself for
the right woman.

423
00:25:20,570 --> 00:25:21,830
Who was saving himself?

424
00:25:22,170 --> 00:25:23,220
Alan.

425
00:25:23,450 --> 00:25:26,640
Yeah, he'd been sniffing round you for
years, haven't he, Sal?

426
00:25:26,750 --> 00:25:27,830
No, do it after.

427
00:25:29,240 --> 00:25:31,710
Ralphie, Alan have always owned a candle
for you.

428
00:25:31,840 --> 00:25:35,460
Well, more of a blowtorch than a candle,
Carl said.

429
00:25:35,461 --> 00:25:38,559
Actually, Nancy, I will have some of
this cake.

430
00:25:38,560 --> 00:25:41,090
He must have asked you out about, what,
ten times?

431
00:25:41,180 --> 00:25:42,720
Oh, shut up, Nadine. Maybe more.

432
00:25:43,660 --> 00:25:44,710
I don't know.

433
00:25:44,860 --> 00:25:46,480
Asking someone out for ten times.

434
00:25:47,140 --> 00:25:48,460
You've got to give it to him.

435
00:25:48,780 --> 00:25:50,380
Must be the recipe for some time.

436
00:25:52,400 --> 00:25:53,540
Stunning, this is mine.

437
00:25:53,640 --> 00:25:54,690
Stunning.

438
00:25:57,950 --> 00:25:59,000
I don't mind cooking.

439
00:25:59,190 --> 00:26:00,850
I've got a great recipe for fish.

440
00:26:01,330 --> 00:26:02,380
Curry, is it?

441
00:26:02,610 --> 00:26:03,660
Gal.

442
00:26:03,930 --> 00:26:05,510
I don't only eat curry, you know.

443
00:26:06,390 --> 00:26:08,920
Although, as it happens, it is a curry
recipe, yes.

444
00:26:10,210 --> 00:26:13,430
You know, when you first moved out to
Canada, how was it?

445
00:26:14,630 --> 00:26:15,680
I was only 17.

446
00:26:16,130 --> 00:26:17,570
I can't remember it that well.

447
00:26:17,571 --> 00:26:21,269
I mean, did it take you long to get used
to it, like?

448
00:26:21,270 --> 00:26:22,320
A bit, I suppose.

449
00:26:23,070 --> 00:26:24,750
I wouldn't live anywhere else, no.

450
00:26:26,290 --> 00:26:27,850
That's what I've been thinking.

451
00:26:28,750 --> 00:26:30,740
I wouldn't mind giving it a go out
there.

452
00:26:31,830 --> 00:26:34,420
I've got nothing to lose. It's all going
on from here.

453
00:26:34,990 --> 00:26:37,880
If I could stay with you for a bit, just
till I set myself up.

454
00:26:37,881 --> 00:26:41,209
I'd get my own place, you know, once I
had the cash.

455
00:26:41,210 --> 00:26:45,949
It's not that. It's just, I mean, coming
over on holiday, that's one thing, but

456
00:26:45,950 --> 00:26:49,870
moving out there, that's... You did it?
Yeah, but I was with my parents.

457
00:26:52,070 --> 00:26:53,870
You're my parent, aren't you?

458
00:26:56,691 --> 00:26:58,599
All right, boys.

459
00:26:58,600 --> 00:26:59,800
See anything you like?

460
00:27:00,020 --> 00:27:01,070
Look.

461
00:27:05,620 --> 00:27:11,360
The hoop should be laid out as per the
diagram on page seven.

462
00:27:12,220 --> 00:27:16,760
The central peg should be hammered in
securely before play can begin.

463
00:27:17,160 --> 00:27:18,900
I think that's done it, Nance.

464
00:27:25,540 --> 00:27:26,590
Right, lad.

465
00:27:27,850 --> 00:27:30,890
Who knows the best way to cook a fish in
the wild?

466
00:27:32,830 --> 00:27:33,880
Little Alan.

467
00:27:34,510 --> 00:27:35,560
Where's my dad?

468
00:28:19,150 --> 00:28:20,200
I got this from NASA.

469
00:28:21,170 --> 00:28:22,710
Well, not actually from NASA.

470
00:28:23,810 --> 00:28:25,920
From the outdoor pursuit shop in
Newport.

471
00:28:26,470 --> 00:28:28,940
They use these on the space shuttle,
apparently.

472
00:28:29,510 --> 00:28:31,470
Keeps soup hot at zero gravity.

473
00:28:32,310 --> 00:28:34,270
24 hours in a row.

474
00:28:35,790 --> 00:28:40,909
Dad, how much does all this stuff cost?
It doesn't matter. The only thing that

475
00:28:40,910 --> 00:28:43,020
matters is that you are having a good
time.

476
00:28:43,970 --> 00:28:46,200
You are having a good time, aren't you,
son?

477
00:28:47,170 --> 00:28:48,220
Yeah.

478
00:28:51,950 --> 00:28:54,420
Have you told Mum how much? I'm not a
bloody idiot.

479
00:28:56,510 --> 00:28:57,560
Right, we're sorted.

480
00:28:58,410 --> 00:28:59,470
We want to go left.

481
00:29:00,270 --> 00:29:02,310
East -ish.

482
00:29:07,570 --> 00:29:09,030
Scary to think he's in charge.

483
00:29:09,990 --> 00:29:11,040
Is it?

484
00:29:23,449 --> 00:29:29,490
I am... My name is Alan. And I am in
control.

485
00:29:29,950 --> 00:29:35,989
I can achieve anything because all I
have to do is breathe

486
00:29:35,990 --> 00:29:38,150
and believe.

487
00:29:39,350 --> 00:29:42,730
Breathe and believe.

488
00:29:53,550 --> 00:30:00,070
You know that whatever stands in your
way, you have the power to conquer it.

489
00:30:03,890 --> 00:30:04,940
Hold on!

490
00:30:05,690 --> 00:30:07,410
Oh! Oh!

491
00:30:08,290 --> 00:30:10,010
Okay, lads, gather round.

492
00:30:10,250 --> 00:30:16,129
A slight change of plan. We best split
into pairs now and spread out more. Give

493
00:30:16,130 --> 00:30:17,180
us a better chance.

494
00:30:17,470 --> 00:30:19,670
So choose a partner and buckle up.

495
00:30:38,361 --> 00:30:43,709
Then you were knackered. Yeah, well, you
would say that.

496
00:30:43,710 --> 00:30:46,529
Well, I hear that once you get married,
you don't hardly do it no more, and

497
00:30:46,530 --> 00:30:47,249
that's normal.

498
00:30:47,250 --> 00:30:51,989
Me and your Uncle Di have done it six
times a week since 1987, and there's

499
00:30:51,990 --> 00:30:53,040
no sign of a letter.

500
00:30:53,930 --> 00:30:55,610
Secret of a strong marriage, that.

501
00:30:55,870 --> 00:30:59,749
Actually, the secret of a good marriage
is communication, patience, and

502
00:30:59,750 --> 00:31:00,800
friendship.

503
00:31:00,950 --> 00:31:02,630
Where to do you get that from, Tan?

504
00:31:02,631 --> 00:31:03,829
Your village, anything?

505
00:31:03,830 --> 00:31:05,250
No, loose women.

506
00:31:05,590 --> 00:31:09,090
Oh, you're all talking wank. There's no
secret, Press.

507
00:31:09,500 --> 00:31:11,670
You've just got to make it up as you go
along.

508
00:31:12,600 --> 00:31:15,370
Shame that theory didn't work for you,
though, Stella.

509
00:31:15,420 --> 00:31:16,470
Oh, look out.

510
00:31:16,800 --> 00:31:19,680
What? What she means is, you're
divorced, aren't you?

511
00:31:20,240 --> 00:31:21,580
So, you know.

512
00:31:21,581 --> 00:31:25,599
Oh, and when are you getting married to
my ex -husband then, Nadine? Oh, no, I

513
00:31:25,600 --> 00:31:27,400
forgot. You haven't asked, have you?

514
00:31:27,980 --> 00:31:29,180
More wine, ladies.

515
00:31:33,540 --> 00:31:34,590
Oh!

516
00:31:37,460 --> 00:31:38,510
Luke, about earlier.

517
00:31:39,070 --> 00:31:41,480
Get some money, bud. It's a stupid idea.
Forget it.

518
00:31:42,210 --> 00:31:43,260
Okay.

519
00:31:44,090 --> 00:31:45,650
I'm just surprised, that's all.

520
00:31:45,870 --> 00:31:47,980
I'll just stay home and knit cars
instead.

521
00:31:47,981 --> 00:31:50,669
Luke. Get a girl up my daft, buy a
burger van. World's my oyster.

522
00:31:50,670 --> 00:31:52,209
I'm saying I don't want you to come.

523
00:31:52,210 --> 00:31:53,029
Yeah, right.

524
00:31:53,030 --> 00:31:55,620
Oh, for God's sake, I'm trying to
apologise, okay?

525
00:31:55,621 --> 00:31:58,869
And if you don't listen, then that's
fine, but give me a break.

526
00:31:58,870 --> 00:32:02,540
And change the record, because at the
moment you're acting like a bloody

527
00:32:05,290 --> 00:32:06,340
Who's that?

528
00:32:29,930 --> 00:32:31,790
for this, lads. I really appreciate it.

529
00:32:31,850 --> 00:32:32,900
No worries.

530
00:32:33,530 --> 00:32:34,910
I've been going down the gym.

531
00:32:35,170 --> 00:32:38,600
Every night I get back and Nancy just
fills me with these bloody pies.

532
00:32:39,890 --> 00:32:40,940
And hot pots.

533
00:32:42,050 --> 00:32:44,220
She don't like them if I don't have
seconds.

534
00:32:45,430 --> 00:32:46,480
And pudding.

535
00:32:47,390 --> 00:32:48,440
Boiled in a can.

536
00:32:49,750 --> 00:32:50,800
With tip -top.

537
00:32:52,170 --> 00:32:54,220
I don't even think they've still made
it.

538
00:32:56,510 --> 00:32:57,560
What?

539
00:33:03,010 --> 00:33:07,410
Where is the naughtiest place you've
ever done?

540
00:33:07,411 --> 00:33:08,349
Earth easy.

541
00:33:08,350 --> 00:33:12,329
Me and Sonny once did it in the back of
his dad's... What

542
00:33:12,330 --> 00:33:16,090
about you, Nancy?

543
00:33:16,470 --> 00:33:19,060
Where's the naughtiest place you've ever
had sex?

544
00:33:19,610 --> 00:33:20,930
Rill. Rill.

545
00:33:22,710 --> 00:33:23,760
Nadine.

546
00:33:24,490 --> 00:33:25,540
Up the back alley.

547
00:33:30,081 --> 00:33:36,849
that. We did try the tradesman's once,
but Carl said it made him feel sick, so

548
00:33:36,850 --> 00:33:37,900
we give up.

549
00:33:39,110 --> 00:33:40,770
I won't offer again, I told him.

550
00:33:42,290 --> 00:33:43,340
Careful.

551
00:33:43,790 --> 00:33:45,330
Careful. Careful, man.

552
00:33:46,430 --> 00:33:48,290
You, uh, do you know that Wonderwall?

553
00:33:49,550 --> 00:33:50,600
Stunning.

554
00:33:53,790 --> 00:33:55,650
Margie? Do you want to go on my death?

555
00:33:56,290 --> 00:33:57,340
Aye.

556
00:34:03,639 --> 00:34:05,559
I don't know what you're doing, though.

557
00:34:06,820 --> 00:34:07,870
Right,

558
00:34:09,020 --> 00:34:10,640
hand over your plates then, lads.

559
00:34:10,960 --> 00:34:16,219
I don't believe that anybody feels the
way I do about you now.

560
00:34:16,980 --> 00:34:20,199
Madam, you are disturbing the other
customers.

561
00:34:21,020 --> 00:34:23,610
Follocks, I was. Ma 'am, you're hurting
my shoulder.

562
00:34:24,739 --> 00:34:26,500
There was no one else down there.

563
00:34:26,800 --> 00:34:29,210
Because they all left when you started
singing.

564
00:34:29,211 --> 00:34:32,888
It was like a morgue, it was. You know
what I mean, don't you, Tan?

565
00:34:32,889 --> 00:34:36,949
Yes. Right, I'll be back now. I just got
a call. Die a minute.

566
00:34:37,230 --> 00:34:38,280
Aye, aye.

567
00:34:38,550 --> 00:34:39,650
Oink, oink.

568
00:34:39,989 --> 00:34:41,290
Nudge, nudge.

569
00:34:42,050 --> 00:34:44,290
One of them phone calls it is, that.

570
00:35:01,800 --> 00:35:04,570
Look, all I'm saying is there's nothing
for me over you.

571
00:35:04,860 --> 00:35:09,679
Sign on, go down the Legion, watch
tellies. Same old, same old. I know, but

572
00:35:09,680 --> 00:35:12,119
least here you've got your mates, you've
got your family.

573
00:35:12,120 --> 00:35:16,500
It's a big thing, Emma Grayson. I know.
If you really want to come to Canada,

574
00:35:16,760 --> 00:35:21,140
and I mean really want to, then I'll
help. But you've got to be sure.

575
00:35:23,140 --> 00:35:24,190
I am sure.

576
00:35:31,370 --> 00:35:34,230
Oh, Master, I've been such a bad girl.

577
00:35:34,510 --> 00:35:39,449
I got caught in the hayloft with the
farmhand, and the farmer gave me such a

578
00:35:39,450 --> 00:35:42,650
spanking. Listen, love, I need to tell
you something.

579
00:35:42,870 --> 00:35:47,170
You could cook an egg on my backside.
It's that red, raw and hot.

580
00:35:47,690 --> 00:35:49,210
Just stop. I'm all wet.

581
00:35:50,530 --> 00:35:53,890
That's what I said to him, but he
wouldn't stop.

582
00:35:54,390 --> 00:35:55,440
He just...

583
00:36:01,050 --> 00:36:02,100
Di?

584
00:36:02,101 --> 00:36:06,289
Do you think you should drink some
water? Forget about everything else.

585
00:36:06,290 --> 00:36:12,630
money, houses, sex, fame, and houses,
you know?

586
00:36:13,590 --> 00:36:17,370
It's family, and family stay together.

587
00:36:18,070 --> 00:36:19,750
And that's where we are, you know?

588
00:36:20,050 --> 00:36:21,130
Oh, yes, she is.

589
00:36:21,410 --> 00:36:22,460
How was it?

590
00:36:22,590 --> 00:36:24,910
Did Di remember his hands -free kiss?

591
00:36:24,911 --> 00:36:28,489
Oh, I'd have thought I'd have put more
colour in her cheeks then, but look at

592
00:36:28,490 --> 00:36:30,250
her. She looks like death warmed up.

593
00:36:31,600 --> 00:36:33,770
Which is quite funny for an
encyclopaedia.

594
00:36:34,260 --> 00:36:35,580
Any more of that wine left?

595
00:36:36,240 --> 00:36:38,580
Oh, bad signal, was it?

596
00:36:39,000 --> 00:36:41,840
Or was thy tentpole not extended?

597
00:36:42,440 --> 00:36:43,880
No, everything's fine still.

598
00:36:43,920 --> 00:36:44,970
I know that face.

599
00:36:44,971 --> 00:36:46,419
What's up?

600
00:36:46,420 --> 00:36:47,580
Oh, you just leave it.

601
00:36:48,240 --> 00:36:49,290
What's up?

602
00:36:49,840 --> 00:36:51,340
I will tell you in the morning.

603
00:36:51,940 --> 00:36:55,580
Stop being such a bloody drama queen,
man. What's going on?

604
00:36:55,581 --> 00:36:58,099
All right, fine. Do you really want to
know?

605
00:36:58,100 --> 00:36:59,480
I remember my stag.

606
00:37:01,160 --> 00:37:03,320
The lad's got me a belly gram.

607
00:37:03,780 --> 00:37:05,180
Big fat girl, a strip.

608
00:37:06,520 --> 00:37:07,600
Quite cool, actually.

609
00:37:07,940 --> 00:37:09,100
On her more than me.

610
00:37:10,000 --> 00:37:12,740
Emma? Bloody hell, Sammy, my mum's going
mental.

611
00:37:13,160 --> 00:37:15,800
She had to be 20, 21 stone.

612
00:37:16,680 --> 00:37:19,330
Poor thing started crying halfway
through the song.

613
00:37:19,331 --> 00:37:20,339
She's what?

614
00:37:20,340 --> 00:37:21,699
Just get Luke, will you, babe?

615
00:37:21,700 --> 00:37:22,780
I've got to talk to him.

616
00:37:22,860 --> 00:37:27,119
In the end, we just told her to put her
clothes back on and come and have a beer

617
00:37:27,120 --> 00:37:29,950
with us. Bloody hell. But are you all
right, little thing?

618
00:37:30,330 --> 00:37:32,310
Worked out stunning, to be honest, mate.

619
00:37:32,930 --> 00:37:35,220
Cos she won some lamb chops in the
raffle, eh?

620
00:37:40,430 --> 00:37:45,730
So, Canada, eh?

621
00:37:47,290 --> 00:37:48,340
What?

622
00:37:48,570 --> 00:37:52,190
I couldn't help it, I was in my tent,
just grabbing a beer and that.

623
00:37:53,350 --> 00:37:55,030
Don't say nothing to Mam, Uncle Di.

624
00:37:55,250 --> 00:37:57,050
Just got to find the right time, like.

625
00:37:57,070 --> 00:37:58,330
No, no, no, of course not.

626
00:37:59,920 --> 00:38:03,920
But you do have to bear in mind that
these things have a habit of getting

627
00:38:04,500 --> 00:38:06,900
She'll be upset at first, of course she
will.

628
00:38:07,780 --> 00:38:10,070
But don't worry, she'll come round in
the end.

629
00:38:10,340 --> 00:38:11,390
Right.

630
00:38:12,220 --> 00:38:13,270
It's for you.

631
00:38:13,740 --> 00:38:14,790
Simmer.

632
00:38:16,760 --> 00:38:19,440
The backstabbing glory boy!

633
00:38:20,240 --> 00:38:22,360
Bastard! Bastard! Just listen!

634
00:38:23,120 --> 00:38:27,939
Right. I want to be on my own. All of
you, just get out. Tell her for God's

635
00:38:27,940 --> 00:38:29,669
sake. Jake, you're making a fool of
yourself.

636
00:38:29,670 --> 00:38:34,009
Oh, piss off, Tanisha. Jake, don't talk
to my mum like that. Oh, you still hear

637
00:38:34,010 --> 00:38:37,569
you? I thought you'd be off in some
corner crying your eyes out because your

638
00:38:37,570 --> 00:38:40,910
beloved Luke is going to Canada to be a
mountain.

639
00:38:40,911 --> 00:38:43,689
And who can blame him? His mother is a
bloody psychopath.

640
00:38:43,690 --> 00:38:46,329
Hey, don't talk to my mum like that.
That's another thing. How long have you

641
00:38:46,330 --> 00:38:50,289
known? When were you going to tell me,
your best friend? I've only just found

642
00:38:50,290 --> 00:38:52,050
out now, you idiot. Right.

643
00:38:52,510 --> 00:38:55,150
We've all had a drink, little tiggity.

644
00:38:55,530 --> 00:38:59,709
Breath and talk about this calmly. Oh,
pipe the hell down, Nadine. Yeah, shut

645
00:38:59,710 --> 00:39:04,450
your festering gob, you tangerine tart.
I've never liked you.

646
00:39:04,730 --> 00:39:05,780
Oh, my God.

647
00:39:06,430 --> 00:39:09,190
It's so not tangerine. It's insane.

648
00:39:09,710 --> 00:39:14,069
We're supposed to be family, aren't we?
No, Tanisha, we are not family. None of

649
00:39:14,070 --> 00:39:15,120
you...

650
00:39:36,360 --> 00:39:37,410
I'm leaving.

651
00:39:54,000 --> 00:39:56,830
I'm not lying, they've got nothing for a
couple of hours.

652
00:39:57,040 --> 00:39:58,090
What?

653
00:40:00,320 --> 00:40:02,060
You're having a laugh, aren't you?

654
00:40:04,590 --> 00:40:07,150
the night you're having, get me a taxi
now.

655
00:40:11,410 --> 00:40:12,460
Oh,

656
00:40:13,170 --> 00:40:19,829
four stars, my

657
00:40:19,830 --> 00:40:20,880
ass.

658
00:40:56,320 --> 00:40:59,560
What? Ma 'am, ma 'am, just listen to me
a minute.

659
00:40:59,860 --> 00:41:00,910
Traitor.

660
00:41:01,300 --> 00:41:03,340
After everything I done for you, Luke.

661
00:41:03,341 --> 00:41:07,519
Look, I don't know what Paul has said,
but can we just talk about it? Isn't any

662
00:41:07,520 --> 00:41:08,570
of you a business?

663
00:41:10,840 --> 00:41:12,220
You're not my son anymore.

664
00:41:13,280 --> 00:41:14,440
Oh, ma 'am, behave.

665
00:41:15,140 --> 00:41:16,190
You're just pissed.

666
00:41:16,800 --> 00:41:17,850
Bye -bye.

667
00:41:37,800 --> 00:41:38,850
Come and get me.

668
00:41:45,720 --> 00:41:47,360
What a fantastic time, boys.

669
00:41:48,400 --> 00:41:49,450
Oh, no.

670
00:41:49,500 --> 00:41:50,550
Look at this way.

671
00:41:51,460 --> 00:41:52,720
At least we got our health.

672
00:41:52,920 --> 00:41:54,120
Yeah, them birds bust.

673
00:41:54,440 --> 00:41:55,490
Come on, Ed, start.

674
00:41:57,960 --> 00:41:59,220
Come on. And they're close.

675
00:42:21,520 --> 00:42:22,570
Hello, love.

676
00:42:29,540 --> 00:42:31,340
Am I that bad a mother?

677
00:42:34,400 --> 00:42:38,120
Luke goes to prison, and then he goes to
Canada.

678
00:42:38,480 --> 00:42:40,160
Anything to avoid me.

679
00:42:40,420 --> 00:42:41,470
Hey, no.

680
00:42:42,920 --> 00:42:46,410
They've only known each other a week,
and they're moving in together.

681
00:42:47,840 --> 00:42:49,760
I don't know if this helps, but...

682
00:42:51,210 --> 00:42:56,309
You was that year now, clutched up,
crying on my cardi, just like when you

683
00:42:56,310 --> 00:42:57,360
little 'un.

684
00:42:58,090 --> 00:42:59,670
I seen you cry as a baby.

685
00:43:00,690 --> 00:43:02,250
I seen you cry as a toddler.

686
00:43:03,590 --> 00:43:05,670
I seen you cry as a stroppy teenager.

687
00:43:07,390 --> 00:43:09,170
You saying I cry too much?

688
00:43:09,810 --> 00:43:10,860
No.

689
00:43:11,990 --> 00:43:17,410
I'm saying if you love your parents, and
Luke does love you,

690
00:43:19,370 --> 00:43:20,970
And you'll always need them.

691
00:43:22,070 --> 00:43:23,670
Nothing changes that.

692
00:43:24,250 --> 00:43:25,950
No matter where you go.

693
00:43:30,730 --> 00:43:32,750
I want to go home.

694
00:43:33,330 --> 00:43:39,070
The world is too heavy to beg for my
shoulder.

695
00:43:39,690 --> 00:43:44,190
Come take the weight of me now.

696
00:43:44,191 --> 00:43:49,769
I want to stand there in that courtroom
and look them right in the eye when I

697
00:43:49,770 --> 00:43:51,569
say it. Show them who they're dealing
with.

698
00:43:51,570 --> 00:43:53,130
You're definitely going then?

699
00:43:55,230 --> 00:43:59,169
Yeah. You might know how to order
paintbrush and gloss a window frame, but

700
00:43:59,170 --> 00:44:02,000
you can't write poems like Carl do. I
just want you to sigh.

701
00:44:03,190 --> 00:44:04,240
I'm pregnant.

702
00:44:05,150 --> 00:44:06,530
Oh, my God. Right.

703
00:44:07,150 --> 00:44:08,410
Stay there. Don't move.

704
00:44:08,411 --> 00:44:10,319
I'll be there now.

705
00:44:10,320 --> 00:44:14,870
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